Does God Feel Sad When She Sees Us Struggling?

Last week, when I dropped Ella off at pre-school, there was a letter in her cubby from the Adapted Physical Education Teacher. She had done an assessment of Ella’s gross motor skills to track the progress she is making with her delayed left side. The assessment listed her progress in specific skill areas and gave an overall “ranking.”

At 39-months Ella’s gross motor skills are at a 21-month level. While I am well aware of Ella’s physical delay and have read various assessments in the past, there was something about this one that caused a deep sadness to well up from within me.

For some reason, I was particularly struck by the description of Ella’s jumping skills. The contrast between my perception of Ella’s attempts to jump – adorable, focused, vibrant – and the clinical terms used in the assessment – “Ella is unable to jump off the ground at this time, but she is showing emergence of this skill.” – struck me right in the heart and the tears began to flow.

I have witnessed this deep sadness in other parents and I know that I have at times been the source of this sadness for my own parents. This sadness, however, is not limited to parents of children with disabilities. It is the deep sadness that comes from watching your child – or anyone you love – struggle. It is a sadness and sense of helplessness that comes from the desire to make everything all right for your child when there is nothing that you can do.

As I drove towards my office, heart broken open, I began to wonder how God/Source/The Universe feels when she/he/it sees us struggling and living far below our potential.

It has been postulated that most of us are accessing and utilizing a mere 5-10% of our potential. If God were to have an assessment done on any of us we would certainly fall well below the “baseline” level of our potential.

Does God cry when seeing this?

My guess is no. God doesn’t strike me as one who gets caught in the trap of attachment. I believe that God sees through our struggles and into our essence. God sees our light, our full potential, shining brightly even when we don’t see it ourselves. God knows that our struggles provide the most potent opportunities to explore our self-created limitations and expand our expression of who we are.

God doesn’t get caught up in wondering what he can do to make it better. He knows that everything is perfect. Including each and every one of us!

God doesn’t wonder if she made a mistake when she created these beings (us) with limitless potential only to see them floundering to access even a tiny fraction of their power. She knows that it is through our struggles that we will, eventually, access our limitless potential.

There are times, quite often, actually, when I hold that Divine perception of Ella and see the incredible light that shines from her eyes: When I watch the intensity that she brings to her playing and learning. When I see her struggling to do things that her peers do easily. When I feel the uninhibited tenderness as she sits with me in the rocking chair and lays her head on my chest. When she gets frustrated and says, “Need help Dada,” and I encourage her to try it again. I even can hold the Divine perception of her (usually) in those moments when she connects fully with her frustration and sadness and expresses it freely.

In those moments, when I see her light, her full potential, I don’t get caught up in thinking that she is less than perfect, less than whole. I don’t look at her as a number on a scale or compare her with anyone else. I don’t wonder if I did anything “wrong” or if I somehow contributed to her disability.

But when I read that assessment, I could not stop myself from going to that place of wondering, of attachment, of deep sadness that Ella is not accessing her full potential. I got caught up in the clinical rankings and began comparing Ella and basing my perception of her on that comparison.

This experience reminded me just how tenuous our hold is on Divine perception. Our ability to see the full potential within everyone is easily shaken by our perception of the “real” physical world.

As we make our way up the vibrational scale of the Law of Attraction and move forward on our path of personal evolution, the consistency with which we hold others in the place of Divine perception can provide a valuable feedback mechanism.

Begin to pay attention to the place from which you are perceiving those around you. Are you focusing on their light or their darkness? Are you seeing their perfection or their problems? Are you appreciating their presence in your life or blaming them for what is wrong with your life?

The choice of how you perceive those around you is not always easy but it is always yours to make.

Remember that what you focus on expands in your life. If you focus on the darkness in those around you, you attract more darkness into your life. If you focus on people’s problems, you attract more problems into your own life.

If you want more joy in your life, focus on the joy you see in others. If you want more peace, focus on the peace you see in others.

I know that Ella is getting the best possible care for her condition and I recognize that she will continue to be assessed and evaluated. And while I don’t agree with the underlying concept of assessment, I accept that it is part of the system within which Ella will receive her care.

What I do know is that I will continue to hold as fully as possible onto my Divine perception of Ella. I will continue to see her perfection, her light and the joy she brings to this world. And I will hold onto the knowledge that her physical struggle is providing a powerful opportunity for her to expand her perception and expression of who she truly is.

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      22 Responses to “Does God Feel Sad When She Sees Us Struggling?”

      1. Niya Christine on February 28th, 2007 3:31 pm

        She’s so blessed to have you as her Daddy holding her in the light you do. This to me IS the best care. Your compassion is infectious. I have tears still from reading this…beautiful!

      2. Jane Sheppard on February 28th, 2007 2:30 pm

        Ed,

        Tears came to my eyes when I read this. What you wrote is profoundly wonderful. You have definitely expressed in a very beautiful way the key to successful parenting. Seeing our children as God sees them is the highest and greatest thing we can do as parents. This allows them to fully be who they are, and there’s nothing better than that! Thank you for this great article. -Jane

      3. Karen Lynch on February 28th, 2007 3:35 pm

        Did you listen to Abraham-Hicks last monthly tape? Someone asked about her daughter with cerebral palsy and Abraham responded that she came here to make a point that it is all just energy and that the little girl is more connected and clear than anyone in her life.
        It sounds as if you are sending your sweet Ella wonderful and inspired energy. Continue to focus on her perfection.
        Joy and Blessings to you and Ella.

      4. Edward Mills on February 28th, 2007 10:02 pm

        Thank you all for your kind words.

        Jane: Yes, seeing our children as God sees them is the greatest gift we can give them. It’s just not always easy!

        Niya: I am blessed to have her as my daughter!

        Karen, I have not heard the A-H CD from last month. It sounds like it would be very appropriate. I’ll see if I can get a copy. Thanks for the tip!

      5. Chris Vomvolakis on March 1st, 2007 6:30 am

        Ed,

        Your blogs are always full of warmth and expressive of an appreciation that adds to the light in this world, however, this one in particular is outstanding in its hearfelt message and clear, articulate prose.

        I am deeply touched. Thank you for sharing this profound insight.

        Amities,

        Chris

      6. Laurie Sequana Stolmaker on March 1st, 2007 5:39 pm

        Hi Ed,

        I popped in to see about joining you on Saturday. Once again, I am in love with your way of relaying your message. As a former special ed teacher, turned therapist, I have spent years listening to the losses and sadness parents experience as we watch our kids experience life. As a parent of a 9th grader and a 21 year old, I can attest to the ongoing compassion, sadness and celebration that flow through me while holding my two boys in the light. The comparing and competition in our schools has not generally served my kids. I have to hold to my value that they deserve to love their lives right now- not after they get heir grades, finish their homework and do as they are told at school.
        Thank you for being a voice for unconditional love.

      7. janice mckay on March 1st, 2007 7:17 pm

        I am always sad about the comments about a child or adult with disabilities. According to Native American legend a person with disabilities is a holy one or chosen one.
        Ella is a teacher. She is here to give lessons to others about her disability. Ella is so perfect that a bit of her is still with God.
        She has given you lessons, and you have learned well that she is a light. A special light to love.
        I worked with people with disabilities, and they are a higher life form. They cannot climb steps like others. They have made their own steps that they can climb, but we can learn from them how to climb their steps.
        Don’t let the system label her because most of them have not climbed the steps of disabilities.
        Jan

      8. Edward Mills on March 1st, 2007 7:31 pm

        Chris. As always, I truly appreciate the eloquence and simplicity of your remarks. They mean much to me.

        Laurie. I sure hope that I can continue to encourage Ella to enjoy each moment as you have been doing with your children. Mostly, though, I hope I can just stay out of her way enough to let her hold onto the wonderful sense of presence she has brought with her into this life.

      9. Edward Mills on March 1st, 2007 7:38 pm

        Jan. Thank you for your beautiful words. Ella is, indeed, a light, and she is discovering her own ways to climb stairs in this world. And I am sure that she is also climbing her own steps that I cannot see. And I know that you are right when you say that we can learn from the invisible steps she is climbing. I know I am.

      10. Karen Lynch on March 2nd, 2007 8:54 am

        Hi Ed,
        I thought I would tell you exactly which Abraham/Hicks tape that I spoke of earlier.
        It is 6/17/06 from Fort Collins, CO.
        Some of the comments you have gotten here are so inspiring. You are blessed!
        Karen

      11. Edward Mills on March 2nd, 2007 9:24 am

        Thank you Karen. I will definitely get that CD. If you have a chance can you confirm that it is this CD:

        http://www.abraham-hicks.com/6-17-06.html

        Or, if not, is it on this full workshop series?

        http://www.abraham-hicks.com/F0622.html

        I don’t see a topic point related about what you mentioned above, so I just want to be sure.

        Thanks
        ed

      12. Karen Lynch on March 2nd, 2007 12:14 pm

        Hi Ed,
        Yes it is that CD. The child with the disability was actually mentioned on the part about “Can Children survive divorce”. So no it was not the major topic of the question but just a part of it. But it was still wise and profound. I found it comforting.
        Karen

      13. Edward Mills on March 2nd, 2007 12:29 pm

        Thanks Karen. I’m most definitely looking forward to listening to it.

      14. Carnival of Healing, #75 » Reiki Blogger on March 3rd, 2007 7:13 am

        […] does god feel sad when she sees us struggling? from evolving times. Ed is a favorite of Reiki Blogger and writes another interesting and easy to read post here. Everyone interested in the law of attraction should stop by Ed’s blog and give themselves a present by spending some time reading through his archives. There is alot of great stuff in there. […]

      15. Cheryl Sinkiewicz on March 9th, 2007 11:27 am

        Ed,are you aware of a nutritional company called Reliv International? Their website is http://www.reliv.com. After reading about Ella, I felt it was my duty, knowing what I know about the results people, children and babies have had with these whole food nutritional supplements, that I had to share this with you. I can put you in contact with these people that have had babies with disabilities and after being put on the nutritional supplements are now thriving,happy,healthy children. Please,Ed,it is worth trying.Deeply touched and so sincerely wanting to help. Cheryl

      16. Edward Mills on March 10th, 2007 10:55 am

        Cheryl. Thanks for the info. I will definitely check out their site!

      17. Evolving Times » Carnival Roundup - 3/17/07 on March 17th, 2007 6:19 am

        […] The Carnival of Healing #75 at ReikiBlogger featured my entry: Does God Feel Sad When She Sees Us Struggling? […]

      18. Evolving Times » Tracking As A Powerful Personal Development Tool on May 15th, 2007 6:04 am

        […] “silent” stroke and needed additional tests to determine next steps. I got the assessment from my daughter’s Adapted Physical Education teacher. There was more, but again, you get the […]

      19. Kuan Chan on July 3rd, 2007 11:25 pm

        Dear Ed

        My child has mild CP, vision impairment and other disabilities caused by birth trauma. His prognosis was pretty bad and by the time he was 6, he had 11 operations for various problems and 5 of them were brain related. At 3.5 he walked, but we were told not to expect much. We were told he would have learning difficulties and may have to go to a special school.

        To cut it short, my husband found a book by Glen Doman and we managed to find a lady in Melbourne who knew and believe a lot about his exercise programs. Check out
        (http://www.iahp.org/) I believe you can find their various centres in the US. We did the programs dilligently every day for 4 years. As well, we let him listen to heaps of Mozart and Classical music therapy, did Yoga for kids, read heaps to him, attended a behavioural optometry therapy for 4 years, expose him to all the positive affirmations/teachings from Abraham Hicks, Hay House, Louise Hay etc. and finally for the last 3 and a half years, Reliv nutritional supplement. We find Reliv made a big difference to his immune system, gave him better energy and concentration for school.

        Today, my son is 14 years old in year 8. He goes to a normal school, he loves, English and French, writes (types on his laptop) poems beautifully, plays grade 2 level clarinet ( exam later in Oct) in the school band, just scored an A in AMEB grade 3 piano exam 3 weeks ago, his grade in the last semester range between A>Bs. Love PS2 games, can’t play sports but he doesn’t mind.

        I know how you feel with a child with disabilities. My husband and I were in your shoes over 10 years ago. It takes a lot of energy, time, money and at times, you may wonder if it is all worth it when you can’t seem to see any progress. All I can say is, “Miracles do happen” Have faith, hope and visualise him whole, healthy and happy.

        Email me to find out if you like. I am from Australia.

        Kuan

      20. Kuan on July 4th, 2007 5:47 am

        Dear Ed

        The other thing I forgot to mention is that over the years, I’ve always visualised him doing things and enjoying life like every child, no pain, no palsy, no disabilities, perfect vision, just having fun, loving life. I did not know that was called ‘The law of Attraction’ until a couple of years ago after listening to Louise Hay’s CD.

        For years, my son wanted so much to be able to ride his bike like his friends. Eventually, he did learn to ride with no training wheels just before 11 years old. He was so proud of himself, it was such a gift to see him so happy, enjoying the wind flowing through his hair.

        He has a dream for his future and we’ve encouraged him to continue to dream big using the Law of Attraction.

      21. Edward Mills on July 4th, 2007 8:18 am

        Hello Kuan.

        Welcome to Evolving times. Thank you for the beautiful story and congratulations on the amazing Law of Attraction work you did – without knowing you were doing it.

        Your story is definitely inspiring. I will check out the resources you mentioned and continue to hold a positive vision of wholeness for Ella.

        Thanks again.

      22. Note To Doctors: It’s Time For An Attitude Adjustment - Evolving Times - The Law of Attraction Resource for Personal Growth on October 8th, 2007 11:04 am

        […] On Wednesday, my wife and I took Ella to her first visit with one of the doctor’s who comes into the clinic where she receives physical and occupational therapy for her hemiparesis. […]

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